~stand together~

sixth batch sambestarian's blog


One fine day, as I was thinking to myself, a kinda awkward question came to me which is:

"Do I prefer dominant women or dormant women? Kalau ditakdirkan Allah bakal isteri aku seorang yang Queen Control ataupun seorang yang lebih berjaya atau lebih popular daripada aku, will I, as a man be able to take it?"

It is without a doubt that dominant women are appearing everywhere nowadays. Bilangan kaum Hawa yang memegang jawatan on the managerial level ie directors, managers semakin bertambah dan bertapak in any kind of societies in this world. Heck, I've met more females in those managerial positions as opposed to the male counterparts. It has also been narrated in one of the famous hadith as follows:

Anas ibn Malik said, ” I shall tell you a hadith which I heard from the Messenger of Allah (May Allah shower peace and blessings upon him), and which no one will tell you after me. I heard him say “Among the signs of the Hour will be disappearance of knowledge and the appearance of ignorance. Adultery will be prevalent and the drinking of wine will be common. The number of men will decrease and the number of women will increase until there will be fifty women to be looked after by one man.”"

This hadith was reported in the two Shahihs from the hadith of Abd Rabbihi.


It is without a doubt that 'normal' males cannot accept the fact that their female counterparts are more successful than they are. I've asked a few males friends of mine as to whether they can accept these kinds of women. And not surprisingly, almost all of them cannot accept the fact that their future wives are those of the dominant types. But let's face it, being the current world in which the world in dominated by the number of females, tons of them are capable of supporting themselves, without having to rely on men, let alone to share their lives with them.


Or it could also be in a situation that can be considered much worse off, where the men are basically under the Queen Control regime. The men do not have a say in any kind of major decisions made in regards to family matters or being restricted to their respective partners, which could lead to further complications such as the men not being able to be 'free'.

Or it could be the most simple situation whereby the female partners are generally much better off in terms of position, salaries, or even up to a certain point their popularity as compared to their men partners. Whereby in this situation, the 'normal' men feeling inferior to their female counterparts and thus seek ways to imply their authorities in the relationship, where in normal circumstances, the men will invoke their polygamous rights (hak berpoligami) into the picture, EVEN though they understand very well that they do not have the capability to bear the responsibility that came along with the power to invoke the polygamous rights.


With that said, it is a complicated matter that can be of concern especially in this kind of climate whereby the world is slowly but surely dominated by females. One might even say that this kind of thought will only come from those without enough self confidence to see their partners NOT as superior, BUT as equals. Well, that might be true, but we have to keep in mind that these ARE humans we are talking about.


Well, of course, in the perfect world, if I were to have a more successful wife in my life, I would definitely view it positively, in the sense that I would be happy that someone dependable is on my side. Also as long as she does understand the duties and what can and cannot be done within the scope of being a wife. After all, I myself like smart and outspoken girls as opposed to passive and dormant girls.


The men will definitely have to try to improve on their situation, attitude so to speak, and have more confidence in making decisions to gain the respect of their female partners. And the same goes for women, naturally as women, they have something within themselves to be lead by men. Yes, call me sexist or whatever, but that's how it goes.


But of course, I'm a man that is still subject to criticism. WaAllhua'lam.





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